Review from Parent Night

       I enjoyed seeing all of you at our Parent Information Night and hope you discovered a lot about what we do here, and what your child will be doing here in the years to come.  I highly encourage all of you to attend as many Parent Nights as possible since we try to make them all different even year after year.  It’s for your benefit that we offer these events so that at parent conferences we can discuss your child rather than only going over Montessori theory and lessons.  However, as most of you have experienced, we love talking about what we do and don't mind at all. :)

Here are some general things we discussed that I think everyone will benefit from:

* Independence:  This is something we offer the children and guide them towards.  At home a child can also be more independent by dressing himself/herself, helping with dishes, setting the table, folding clothes, wiping their bottoms, wiping their noses, washing hands with water and soap, picking up toys, etc.

* Not being the center of attention: Helping a child understand that they must wait their turn is part of how our environment is set up.  They must build patience, acceptance, tolerance, and control their will not to interrupt.

       At home, a child can also have such "lessons" by parents setting up guidelines and limits.  Children crave structure and having a set of "family rules/guidelines" will help the child to know what is expected of them and how they should contribute to the well-being of the entire family unit.  Some simple ways are to not respond to a child when they interrupt adults having a conversation, or when they have tantrums to acknowledge them and then tell them you will get back to them when they have calmed down.

* Give them work for their hands: "The hand is the instrument of the mind" is Dr. Montessori's most famous quote and it is being verified by current research.  The more a child uses their hand the more regions in the brain will be developed.  At home, have children cut, clean, squeeze, whisk, scrub, dig, push, etc. These activities will only strengthen their mental capacities.  You do not need to replicate our classroom environment or do "work" such as writing or numbers; those will only tire a child and make them not want to do these at school.  Alternate "work" that is appealing at home is what is essential for their cognitive and social development. 

* Talk to your child: This may seem silly, but sometimes children just want to be heard and talked to.  They want to share their day with you and also hear about your day.  In the rush of our lives when you pick them up and drop them off, be present to greet them or say goodbye.  Being on the phone or not saying hello tend to leave them in a state of anxiety and often they rely on us to comfort them.  Talk to your child about what they like, who they played with, what they ate for a snack, what book they read, or song they sang.  Asking them "what did you do?" is like asking you what did you do in your day.  It's just too much to relay.  Your child works just as hard as you do all day and having them give you a brief explanation is too much.  They will be more likely and more excited to narrate a story of what they played or talked about with a friend. 

*Privilege vs. Necessity:  Most children understand this concept.  When phrased appropriately children will understand what a need is vs a want. Questioning their wants and possible demands will help them to categorize things in an appropriate social manner as well as a way in which they should modify their behavior in social situations.  Understanding privilege is a necessity in our society as most children have far beyond what they need.  Limiting these items and sticking to a minimal amount will also help them to reduce their privileged status. However, when this is not possible, making a list of what is a "privilege" and then letting them know that such things can be taken away if the behavior is not modified will help them to recognize and minimize their behavior. 

* To do at home: Reduce media, reduce privilege, read more books, read to them, read together, cook together, eat together, have family dinner and/or game nights, go on dates with your child, go on dates with your spouse, play together, let them play alone, let them play with nothing, let them be "bored", children need very little to be creative.

       "Do not give to the mind more than what the hand can handle" is a famous Dr. Montessori paraphrase.  If your child cannot button his shirt, eat by themselves, or pull up their pants, don't worry if they don't' know their numbers or can't read yet.  There are many more important things we should be concerned with at this point.  As I said to most of you, your children are born into an affluent, well-educated society.  You have chosen a life where you have placed their educational needs in front, so their education and academics will come as they are absorbing it through their environments.  However, if we don't set up the child to succeed then we (the adults) in that child's life are setting them up for obstacles. And by success, we mean independence, because once a child is independent they can do and learn without us, and that is the greatest opportunity we must offer a child- the chance to develop into a fully functioning and capable human being.  Giving a child the love to learn, and to learn on their own is the greatest "teaching" we can bestow.  Once a child is capable of this quality, he is set for life.

        This is the most apparent in the third year, and when a child is taken out after 2 years, the foundation is set but not visible.  It is in the third year that the cycle is complete and the child can produce all that has been absorbed in the previous years. The mostcruciall year for the Montessori child is that third year, the year when independence is at a peak when confidence is demonstrated when the material has been mastered when the hand has worked to allow the mind to now move freely.  It is in the third year that the masterpiece of the mind is unveiled. 

         I hope you have read to the bottom of this blog.  I thank you for taking the time to do so.  We are here for you, your children, and the community we create.  We (you, me, and your child) are a triangle that has to have all sides working together creating strong bonds for the benefit of the child and the community the child is to enter.  Therefore, as much as we support you, please support the work we do for the sake of the children as well.  It is a pleasure to be surrounded by beings that only know to love and seek to be loved.  Their day is spent trying to emulate you and the other adults in their lives. They seek the good and the love of others, and to be around joy and innocence is a gift we experience daily. 

–Caterpillar Teacher