Order and Consistency

The Importance of Order and Consistency for Toddlers

Have you ever wondered what causes your child to have a meltdown when you take him/her to the store after school? Does your child ever have tantrums that seem to come out of nowhere?

One of Dr. Montessori’s key insights into child development is her identification that young children crave order. They want things to be the same, every day. They are just figuring out the world—a world that is huge and confusing to them, and often a little scary. By preparing their environment to be simple, by keeping things the same, and by sticking to routines, we can help children move through the toddler years with less drama and more enjoyment for all of us.

In our toddler classrooms, children have a consistent routine, with the same schedule every day. Our classroom is a carefully prepared environment that supports a child’s sense of order: materials are always on the same spot on the shelf.

Consistent Routines and A Prepared Environment at Home

Your family will weather the often turbulent toddler years better if you invest some time early on to establish clear routines and to prepare an orderly environment for your child.

Set a daily routine, and stick to it as much as possible.

Decide, in advance, on a schedule that works for everyone in the family. Do you get up early enough to snuggle and read a book— or is morning all about getting dressed, eating, and leaving the house? What will you do after pick-up each day? Will you go home directly—or will you stop at a park for a snack? When will dinner be served—and what does your bedtime routine look like? Once you decide, stick to that plan as much as possible. Some parents have found making a “photo book” or “routine photo chart” helpful to preview routines with their children.

When you deviate from the routine, let your child know in advance. 

If you need to see the doctor or visit a friend after school, let your child know in the morning. When a parent travels, preview the departure—and count down toward her return. If anything changes at home—even just a visit from grandma—do let us know: it helps us put context around a child’s possible changes in mood at school when we know what is happening at home!

Keep your home as clutter-free as possible. 

This applies in particular to your child’s play area. A few toys on open shelves are much better than toy boxes with many items in a jumble. Fewer choices help your child to practice at home what he learns at school—choose an activity, work with it, and then return it to its proper place. A place to hang a jacket and put on shoes as you enter the house can also help with often challenging transition times.

Observe and document when meltdowns tend to happen.

You may be surprised how many of them are due to variations in the routine—a missed nap, a forgotten snack, a misplaced jacket, or a surprise trip to the store. By observing your child, you may often be able to adapt your routine so they feel safer as their need for order and consistency is supported—and you will benefit from fewer melt-downs and a more enjoyable time together.

While it may seem hard to stick to strict routines, keep in mind that this is a temporary phase: by the time your child is five or six, they’ll delight in spontaneous, high-energy excursions with you, and you may be the one who craves a restful day at home on the weekend!