Toddlers Crave Independence

Independence

Dr Montessori said: "Help me to do it by myself" which means we don't help the child to do something that he is capable of doing on his/her own.

During the toddler years, a child is developing physical and cognitive independence, from undressing to feeding him/herself, toddlers are motivated to learn basic daily life skills, at the same time, when a child wants to do it all by him/herself he may tell you "No mommy" whether with words or body language,( that's why observation it's so important, in this way, we can identify what the child wants  to express, or the needs they have) 

Toddlers want to be independent, even if you may not be quite ready for it, a Montessori environment is carefully prepared so that the young child can learn to be independent relatively quickly, (it is important to keep consistency between what you do in the home environment and at school environment) everything that we have at school it's at the child's level and size, everything the children need for their work is accessible to them., we guide them to find items instead of having them the need to ask for tools that are not accessible to them. Anything that children do not know yet to do, they are shown with clear, slow presentations, in an environment like this, many of the typical challenges of toddlerhood noticeably diminish at home, so it may be time to shift away from taking care of your child's every need, to including him/her as an active participant in daily life tasks, consider little changes, you can make at home such as:

1. Your child can choose the clothing he /she will wear every day (offer two choices)
2. You can create small spaces around the house, for example, a small shelf or furniture where he/she can pick up activities or toys to work with.
3. In the bathroom have a stool for him/her to wash hands independently, a basket for dirty underwear and dirty clothes, an area for clean underwear that he/she can get easily without the help of an adult, and a small basket with toileting books. 
4. Set up a space for your toddler shoes where he/she can easily get them without needing your help. 

Toileting is always an important topic to talk about with our children. Most of our children are working on this milestone right now, and we are reading books about toileting. For example, "Like a potty for me" and "Once upon a potty." Thank you so much to all the families for working hard during this process. It's not easy and requires a lot of physical and mental effort from our toddlers, who work hard; they are all doing so well! Keep the hard work at home, remember to have a schedule and routine for toileting, and take them to the bathroom during transitions (before and after eating, before and after nap time, before going out, and when you come back home) 

I know going out with a toddler who is working on the toileting process is not an easy task,  a good tool that can help you is to have a potty in your car in this way you can invite your child to use it if it needs it, and remember consistency and routine is the key of success try to avoid diapers as much as you can, if your child is having toilet events its ok, it's important to have a consequence, we don't see this as a failure, we see it as an opportunity to work, for example, it is a good opportunity for them to work on dressing and undressing, ( with collaboration ) that means we won't do everything for them, it means we guide them to be successful in this area,  as adults you do one step and then invite your child to do the next step, for example, if the underwear is a little bit tide, help your child to pull it down a little bit, then invite him/her to do the rest, in this way we avoid frustration from our toddlers by not asking them to do something they cannot accomplish yet, by working with our toddlers with collaboration we get more cooperation, in this way they can easily accomplish the task they are working on, like dressing and undressing.